Eating for Two

I've begun to compare my surgery to giving birth.  I'm having something removed from my body, like a mother would when she delivers.  (My delivery is of course the C-section kind.  Haha.)  Children are a lifetime commitment and responsibility, as is this surgery.  Children bring with them both joys and disappointments as well, which I'm sure I'll experience throughout the rest of my life.  With my faux pregnancy, I even need to take some "maternity" leave post delivery, follow a special diet leading up to the delivery and take "pre-natal" vitamins/minerals.  I'm also eating large quantities of food for my stomach baby due on October 17th.  I'm eating enough for two right now - some for me and some for my stomach baby. 

I've begun the "nesting" phase for surgery.  I'm mentally preparing for the changes to come, shopping like a crazy woman for food, supplies, and vitamins/minerals, and clearing out cabinets and the pantry.  Heck, I'm even buying kiddie plates, bowls, silverware and sippy cups – like an expectant mother.  I have found that the best thing about children's items is that they come in fun colors and patterns.  (Side note - I tried drinking out of a sippy cup tonight just to see what it felt like and let me tell you, I have no idea how those toddlers do it - it involves a lot of suction to get anything to come out.  I’ve seen kids guzzle a sippy cup down in no time flat – this is an incredible feet to me now.  It's actually good thing for a post-bariatric surgery patient that it takes a while for the liquid to come out because it should take me 3-5 minutes to drink an ounce - the size of a medicine cup.  I will also be on a strict liquid diet post-surgery and I'm supposed to spend 30-45 minutes drinking 8 oz.  My patience will be tested quickly, I can already tell.)

I've prepared for my surgery by purchasing a lot of the foods that I will be eating for the two weeks prior to surgery and the two weeks after surgery.  I've gotten the vitamins/minerals that I will need before and after and tons of kid-size portions of "china" and silverware.  I'm also fully stocked on Glad 1/2 cup size containers (this is a full meal size). 

Over the past two days, I've been in the hospital for appointments, pre-operative testing, and classes.  I've been poked, prodded, X-rayed, and electrocuted (OK, not the last one, but I had an EKG, which senses the electrical signals from your heart – so maybe I was electrocuting the machine then).  And I had the joy of peeing in a cup as well.  Yesterday was very anxiety provoking.  The nurse practitioner that I saw in the surgeon's office was not very friendly (maybe due to her pregnancy - at least mine is a happy pregnancy) and the office didn't have my appointment scheduled correctly in the book.  Today on the other hand, was a lot more relaxing and possibly even enjoyable.  I was cracking jokes with the women in the hematology department and some of the other patients in my class.

When I had my EKG, I didn't put two-and-two together that you would have to be topless.  I knew that they would most likely have to put electrodes on my chest, but I didn't think about having my breasts exposed on the table.  I felt like I was at the gynecologist's office (another pregnancy reference there).  The women in the hematology department made a comment that the doctors would be seeing a lot more of me on the day of surgery and I told her that was fine because at that point I would have a nice cocktail of drugs in my system and I wouldn’t feel self-conscience or care what they saw.

I had a four-hour class today on the surgery procedure, what to expect after surgery, and what to eat before and after surgery.  (This was my Lamaze class so to say.)  It was nice to meat other expectant mothers and fathers and talk about due dates and doctors.  We talked about our fears, hopes, and expectations with the surgery.  We also discussed why we had chosen the particular procedure that we had since there were both sleeve gastrectomy and gastric bypass patients in the class; there was even one guy who was having a gastric plication with a band added (that's one crazy and interesting surgery). 

The nurse that taught the first part of the class was a gastric bypass patient herself - 18 months out from surgery.  It was great hearing her personal story.  She worked with bariatric patients long before she had the procedure herself, but now she can personally relate to her patients.  She regained her confidence after losing 125 lbs and decided to divorce her husband after his fifth affair.  She got tired of putting up with him mistreating her.  I think everyone in the class congratulated her on this decision with a “you go, girl!”  (We discussed the emotional and psychological consequences of surgery and how relationships with food, people, and the self will change post-surgery.  This is why Bon Secours has a support group for bariatric patients to attend – to deal with these issues.)

The class was extremely informative and definitely an information overload.  I wish that they had covered a lot of this information in the decision making process before a surgery date is scheduled.  I think a lot of people would change their minds if they knew what the surgery fully entailed and the lifestyle changes that go along with it.  At the point that you go to the class, you're a week to a month away from surgery, and you feel like it's almost too late to back out now (of course, you always have the option of saying no and not going through with it).  I went home with a "surgery and diet manual" that is packed with information.  It's very useful and even has shopping and meal lists in it.  It will become my surgery Bible for the next couple of weeks.

What I’m most concerned about after the class is the drain that I will go home with coming out near my stomach.  I’m not worried about having to empty it, keep track of the amount of discharge coming out of it or recording the color of the discharge.  I’m worried about when it comes out.  The nurse said that she was making up curse words when hers came out because it was so painful.  All I can think is fantastic.  I’ll also go home with this small catheter-type piping under my skin that will gradually release numbing medicine to the incision sites (there will be a total of five incision sites).  This medication is similar to the type that a dentist uses on your gums when you have a procedure done.  It all sounds great to have constant medication until you realize that you have to pull that sucker out yourself.  It probably won’t be very painful, but I’m sure it will feel really weird coming out.  Come to think of it, I might actually enjoy taking it out since I liked removing my sutures from wounds before.

There were several benefits to bariatric surgery that were briefly discussed at the end of class, which can't go without notice.  The ones that I was most interested in were the resolutions of depression in 55% of patients and infertility in 79% of patients.  These issues were the ones that I was most interested in because I have suffered from depression on and off for a majority of my life and was diagnosed with polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) a couple of years ago.  The thought of not having to take anti-depressants anymore is exhilarating.  My anxiety may improve as well since depression and anxiety are linked together in most psychiatric patients.  I'm also thrilled at the prospect of being able to conceive easily.  (We were advised that we will become more fertile post-surgery and that we should be careful and use protection.  This isn't a concern right now in my life, but one day I hope it will be.)

Overall, things are progressing well and I'm getting closer to the big day.  I still haven't told many people and some that I have told are in opposition to my decision, but still support me.  This is all very personal and I'm not ready to admit what I'm doing to others yet.  The nurse who taught the pre-operative class today said that she didn't want to tell people that she was having the surgery or had had the surgery initially, but now she'll tell anyone who will listen.  I think and hope that I will be like her one day with my testimony and story.  I want to be a success story and help others who may be deciding on having bariatric surgery.